Category Archives: Melody

Fun, inexpensive kid craft: button necklaces

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I love buttons. And I’m one of those people who has a difficult time getting rid of something useful. So, I have a rather….extensive button collection. I persuaded my mother to give me hers when she was paring down last year, and the first night I had them, I sat in my sewing room just looking at them and touching them like a thief caresses illicit jewels. I’ve harbored dreams of making a button collage or mosaic one day, but I’m not a very good artist. But yesterday, yesterday I found something to do with some of the larger buttons that is fun and makes my Melody very happy. 

We made button necklaces.

With a little bit of 1/8″ or 1/4″ ribbon, a tapestry needle and some large buttons, you and your wee one will be happily making necklaces in no time! I had Melody pick out several of the very large buttons, 1 1/4″ ones, all sorts of odd colors since they are from my mom’s old button collection. I dug around in my notions and found some 1/4″ hot pink ribbon, and away we went! It was a little difficult for Melody to get the needle through the holes, so I wound up doing that part, but we made two wonderful necklaces and proudly wore them out today during our shopping.

        

Part of our shopping was making a stop at Joanne’s (with coupons, of course) to pick up large plastic craft buttons, more 1/8″ ribbon, and a storage box for “Melody’s things.” We happily spent the afternoon sorting our buttons, and then making another necklace. This is also great practice at hand-eye coordination and small muscle skills.

Give it a try and find your inner jewelry designer at the same time. Your kids will enjoy it and if you are anything like me, you will lose the guilt over all those “extra buttons” that come with every blouse and shirt you buy. :-)

Santa, I’d like…

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This is a much better holiday photo session, probably because Melody knew that Santa could physically see her, lol. She’s somewhat uncertain about the whole “sees you when you’re sleeping, knows when you’re awake” business. Sometimes, Santa calls to check up on her, so she knows that somehow he’s finding out about her behavior, but she probably figures that her parents are ratting her out. Regardless, she was elated to see Santa and was a very good girl.

Lessons learned

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I was inspired recently by Jill over at the Mom Blog, and her post about 11 things that ARE okay for a new mom. Let’s face it, no one knows exactly what to do when they have their first child, and friends of mine who are on their sixth child have said that each one brings new lessons. My mom famously commented that when asked how she would be raising her children, she whacked her fanny and said “by the seat of my pants!” It’s true, and no matter how you prepare, life always throws you a curveball, doesn’t it!? Jill’s post got me thinking about a few of the truisms I could write about parenting. Feel free to add any you like in the comments.

Just when you think you have her figured out, she will change everything on you. (This is actually Charlie’s but it’s so true!)

When something isn’t working it’s okay to change the deal and try a new approach.

Don’t be afraid to teach your child how to use the DVD player. Or the remote. Or the iPhone. Children are smart and need to know these basics now. If the DVD breaks, it’s not the end of the world.

A piece of candy before dinner isn’t going to spoil her appetite, but several pieces will. Anything left a month after Halloween should go straight in the trash (when she’s not looking).

Listen to her music and sing along. Know some of your own songs that she might like and teach them to her. All music doesn’t have to be muppets or cartoon characters singing.

Adapt some of your songs to help in teaching situations. We adapted Weezer’s Can’t Stop Partying to a potty song.

Watch her shows with her and even if it hurts, tell her how happy you are that Dora found the Woozy Wuzzle. 

Instead of extreme baby proofing, try just teaching your child the boundaries. For example, we did not remove our wine rack, we just taught her not to touch it. She still doesn’t. A baby proofing book advised we should have removed that item.

That brings me to baby advice books. They are not always correct. Take the advice and apply it to your situation as best as you can and throw out the stuff that doesn’t make sense for you. Don’t feel guilty about not following those books to the letter! Even Dr. Spock has admitted that not all children are created the same.

Ask your mother! Even if you disagree with some of the things your own parents did raising you, they have been through it, second guessed themselves, and come out the other side. 

The first time she says “I don’t love you!” in a terrible three temper tantrum, it will hurt as if she stabbed you in the heart. It’s okay to let it show that she hurt your feelings. Children are learning appropriate behavior and we are their teachers.

You don’t have to play with her every second of the day. Independent play is healthy and encourages creativity. You also don’t need to have every moment scheduled with an activity. We all need down time, even rambunctious and energetic kids.

Even if you child is potty trained, you should be prepared to help them clean up after the potty until they are about five years old. Flushable wipes will be your best friend.

We all know on some level that these days are short and pass all too quickly, so cherish the moments with your little ones. Before we know it, they will be all grown up and writing their own blogs!

I’m looking forward to…

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I was thinking this weekend about the funny little gifts that children give their parents, some of them so sweet, and others unusual. I can remember giving my mother an orange beaded coin purse that I bought at a boutique at school. It surely was a white elephant and my mom definitely gave me the money for it. I labored over the decision for hours, going back to the room where the boutique was several times through the day. The teacher’s aide who was staffing the room was so patient with me as I repeatedly changed my mind, but I finally bought the little purse. Thinking back on it, it probably cost a whole 25 cents, but my mother profusely thanked me for it and kept it for many years, although I don’t know if she still has it. It meant so much to me to be able to express to her how much I loved her and wanted to select the perfect present, and her cherishing that little purse confirmed to my little mind what I knew anyway – that she loved me. It was like that little purse became a symbol of our bond, and as long as she kept it, we would be close. To an 8 year old, that’s huge! Of course as an adult I don’t need an orange coin purse to confirm that (I love you Mommy!).

I am really looking forward to the little presents and expressions of love that Melody labors over for me and her Dad. Like I said, it was thinking about it over the weekend, and here are some of the things that came to mind as being in our future…

Origami paper balls

Flowers cut from the yard and wrapped with tin foil on the stem

Giving her money to buy me or Dad a little gift

Proudly displaying and using Hello Kitty salt & pepper shakers

Pictures of us drawn with abnormally large heads

Cootie catchers

Hair decorations made from Christmas bows

Home made potholders

Oddly created dinners with strange combinations of food

Love notes written in yellow ink that are impossible to read

Christmas gifts consisting of Post-it notes and Bic pens

Don’t they all sound wonderful!? What would you add to the list?

What is with baby names these days?

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As parents, you spend so much time considering the name(s) of your children. You want the name to be something that inspires confidence, happiness, respect, and more. It has to sound good with your last name, endure as a good business name for the future, and not upset any family members. We agonized over what to name our child, ultimately settling on Melody. We considered family names, but with 14 cousins on Dad’s side there weren’t a lot of family names that hadn’t been taken and Borghild was definitely out. Then we looked on my side, and well, we pretty much have a monopoly on names like Harriet, Henrietta, and Mary. Plus, I have five cousins who have children, so a lot of the family names were taken here as well.

While joking about the crazy ways people spell names these days, we came up with KeLliE, Kassan’dra, and then Mel o’Dee. Melody. Yes, suddenly the quest was over and we selected Melody, not a family name, not an unusual name, but an uncommon name. Of course, there are lots of parents who come up with trendy or unusual names for their children, like ESPN (pronounced Espen) and Talulah, and that doesn’t even consider American “ethnic” names. Unusual names can be difficult to grow up with these days.

But, if you thought some of these trendy names were the original made-up sounding names that make you shake your head in confusion, let me just give you a sampling of names from my family tree, which goes back hundreds of years, but the greatest offenders are the Puritans.

On the male list, we’ve got Ebenezer and Elisha at least ten times; Ichabod, Barzillai and Bethul; Darius, Zeno, and Zophar; Balthazar, Elihu, Jabez and even Gustav, which suddenly sounds pretty normal; Ozias, Obed, Asahel, and oh my god, Nutter; rounding this out we have Pownall, Lyman, Elphias, Arashur and Azariah.

Two long lost relatives whose gender has been lost to the ages are named Freegift and Freeman.

Female names are equally unusual: Huldah, Love, and Experience; Hepzibah, Tamar, and Submit; Charity and Mercy are so common sounding now, next to Zerviah, Desire, Wealthy and Mehitable. We have a Hopestill, and we even have a Jemima.

Hmm, Dakota, Cullen and Piper are all sounding pretty usual, aren’t they?

 

My baby is three!

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It sounds so cliche, but I simply cannot believe that in a blink of an eye, Melody has turned three years old. Seems like just a while ago, she was this tiny little baby who was completely dependent on us for everything. Now she is very INdependent and probably wishes we’d leave her alone at times. Well, maybe not leave her alone, but tonight she did tell me “Mommy, I want you to be nice to me when I poop my pants.” Guess, I’ve been a bit stern about this whole “using the potty” concept.

To celebrate this milestone (seems as though TWO was a huge milestone and ONE was a huge milestone, do they every diminish in their importance??), last week I took Melody and some of her daycare buddies and Rhonda to the Santa Ana Zoo. It was really such a fun and relaxing day! How could I relax at the zoo with four under 4, you ask? It was so easy! Two were in strollers and Mark and Melody walked everywhere. Their enthusiasm for the emu, llamas, bald eagle, golden lion capuchin, and of course the blue tongued skink, all just carried me through on a wave of enjoyment. The little ones were so good, too. Little Kiana is only 19 months and her cute little “look at that!” at everything was so funny, I just had to laugh. The Santa Ana Zoo is perfect for this crowd because it’s over quickly but they feel like they have seen every kind of animal there is.

Saturday of course was Melody’s birthday and we had a party for her here at the house. We had a bounce house again, but surprisingly, Melody was not interested in it until Delaney got here and went into it. From that point until cake, we couldn’t really get her out of it. Caelen came over and bounced, and the three were fast friends. Once Danika and Geneva, Mark and Kadie joined in, the bounce house was full of laughing, tumbling, happy kids. Kudos go out to Diane B who created a sort of game of “throwing” the kids from the side of the bounce house into the middle. It’s hard to explain, but let me tell you, every one of them wanted Diane to grab their butts and throw them. Delaney is particularly aerodynamic and flew the farthest! My friend Melissa and her mom made the gorgeous Tinkerbell cake and it was delicious too. Amazing work, ladies!

Valentine’s Day we just puttered around the house as we were all three exhausted. Of course, that was after Melody and I spent about three hours over at Fort Knott’s for their Civil War encampment. In the past we tried to participate in this event, but since it will always fall on the weekend of Melody’s birthday and Valentine’s Day, I figured it was time to hang up my hoop skirts over President’s Day Weekend and instead be with my family. Didn’t stop me from visiting incognito, but we were able to leave, heh. I did find a beautiful toddler dress that someone had made and altered very poorly. I can only imagine they didn’t know what the heck they were doing since the armscye was only big enough for a doll’s arm to get through. Fortunately I happen to know what I’m doing and I can alter it much better and Melody will have a new dress with a corded petticoat that is simply adorable. It coincidentally perfectly matches the shawl Gramma Alice knitted for Melody’s birthday present.

Today Melody and I were home together and we did a few “fun” chores. We took the front off her crib and turned it into a big girl bed, gulp! She was very excited about it and fascinated with the Tinkerbell sheet set we put on the bed. Very clever, the top sheet has elastic on one end – like a bottom sheet – to keep it tucked in. Dad and I are a teeny tiny bit nervous about her getting out of bed in the middle of the night, but it’s got to happen eventually. Her third birthday is as good a time as any. She also happened to wear big girl panties all day today and didn’t have one accident.

Yes, my baby is growing up and turning into a little girl! Check out new albums in the photo gallery for more pictures.

Week in review

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Last week was eventful and the upcoming week is shaping up to be busy as well. It’s the way life speeds by that gets me every time!

In the last week, we celebrated Auntie’s birthday, she and I went to a Victorian tea (as the Victorians), we found out our dog is fat, John and Melody finished watching all the back episodes of Kimba, we finalized the details for Melody’s birthday party, I cooked a delicious Cheddar Chicken Soup, Nano had 3 teeth pulled, Melody is increasingly stubborn about potty training, John worked about a million hours, we cleaned the spare room enough that it will soon be a guest room, and I baked for our latest soldier through Baking Gals.  Whew!

 

My company has announced a “get fit” program and a bunch of us at work have been walking during our lunch breaks. It’s great and I really felt it the days we didn’t walk due to rain. It’s also fortuitous for Nano because he needs to lose 2 pounds. He’s only 11 pounds but he should be 9. My little doggy is fat, lol. However, it’s more serious than that. He has heart disease and something called a collapsing trachea, which causes him to cough a lot. The doctor thinks that the extra fat around his neck is pressing on his trachea and causing breathing troubles. Nothing to joke about, the dog gets less food and more walks. On top of that, poor guy had to have three molars pulled. Ouchie!

Melody’s birthday is coming up next weekend, and pretty much every day, she asks “is it my birthday today!?” with such a look of excitement and eager joy that I almost want to tell her that it is her birthday, lol. I really can’t wait until Saturday to be able to tell her “yes, Melody, today is your birthday!” We are planning a bouce house (weather forecast is sunny), friends, food, and a Tinkerbell cake. Thursday I will be taking her and some of her daycare buddies to the Santa Ana Zoo, along with Rhonda our babysitter. I’m really looking forward to it!

This morning, she was tired and did not want to get out of bed. She lay there watching as I was gathering clothes for her. She then told me “Mommy, I have a headache. When someone has a headache they have to rest and stay in bed.” I am so not looking forward to her trying to get out of going to school! I can only conclude she got this idea of staying in bed from me, since a couple weekends ago I had a terrible migraine and stayed in bed half the day..

During some of our cleaning of our spare room, I was forced to deal with my old records. You remember those things…vinyl, big pictures on the jackets, lyrics on the inside sleeve? Yeah, so back in the late 80s and early 90s, I collected Depeche Mode records. Specifically I was addicted to British and West German imports. I’d play them once (maybe) to record the music onto a tape and then never play them again. The West German ones were all colored vinyl, beautiful royal blue, neon orange, lemon yellow. I carefully stored them in plastic sleeves to protect the jackets, and never stored them in a garage or attic. Well, this paid off – figuratively and hopefully literally! I was about to send them to Goodwill when I decided to Google “who buys Depeche Mode records” and found a dealer in England. They have made me an offer for some of these records, and that should help out a bit toward my trip to Tennessee in April.

Yowza, how could I have forgotten to mention that I booked our trip to Knoxville?? Melody and I will be visiting the Hall family at the end of April! It will be Melody’s first trip on an airplane; in fact, her first trip anywhere. John of course offered to pay to have Tara come here, but I really want to go there, ha ha. I will even get the chance to see a real Civil War battlefield, AND go to Dollywood! Melody tells me “Mommy, we are going to Hollywood with Cassidy!”

This past weekend we baked for our latest soldier, CPT Steven Wisniewski. CPT Wisniewski is an Army pilot flying Apache helicopters in northern Iraq. He’s young, having graduated from high school in 2001, where he participated in football, wrestling and track. He also loved the arts, participating in the school choir and drama group, National Honor Society, Latin and Spanish clubs. To balance that, he earned his Eagle Scout in Troop 101 in Ohio. CPT Wisniewski went on to Ohio State University where he earned his degree in Engineering with an emphasis on Industrial Design & Systems Engineering. Wow. For this very worthy soldier, we made Cinnabon cookies, merengues, and heart shaped oreos. I hope to get in one more batch of white chocolate chip cranberry cookies and ship this all before the weekend. It won’t reach him by Valentine’s Day, but I hope he will know we are thinking of him and wishing him and his buddies a safe and happy Valentine’s Day.

CPL Wisniewski reminds me a little bit of my cousin George. He has the same zest for life, a few of the same interests – choir, flying, sports – and was also from Ohio. Every part of my being asks that George watch out over this young soldier and keep him safe.

We have been doing a lot of cleaning, getting rid of, donating. One group that has gotten all of our gently used baby gear is a support group for the families of deployed Marines out of Camp Pendleton. I recently received a sweet thank you note from a young lady who took a bus from Corona to Irvine in order to collect my old Pack N Play and high chair. The families of our deployed military suffer so much, it makes my heart break. Having seen some of my friends go through the struggles of being wives of deployed military, I am happy to give up the things we don’t need to someone who needs them so much. The support group is like a Goodwill, but the family pays nothing. If you find it in your heart to make a donation to any organization that helps out like this, please consider it. It makes a big difference!

I’m a slow parent

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We’ve all seen them – the parents who oversee every aspect of every activity or milestone their children make. They are referred to as “helicopter parents.” I knew one a while back. Her son was 12 and she was unable to let him stay home sick from school by himself. She screamed at his soccer coach and teachers because she felt they were treating him differently by requiring him to do the minimum amount of work. Huh?

I’ve often wondered how to draw a balance between the now-idyllic childhood I had Growing Up OC and the over-scheduled, over-homeworked, over-supervised childhood I see my peers’ children experiencing.

We walked to school, often crossing major streets.

We waited at the bus stop alone until our friends showed up.

We drank unfiltered water from the hose and played in the dirt.

We sold Girl Scout cookies door to door.

We rode our bikes over to our friends houses, after school, and came home when it got dark.

We didn’t play organized sports from age 4.

We didn’t have homework in kindergarten. We didn’t even have homework until the 5th grade!

We walked or rode our bike to doctors appointments, the mall, and Mile Square Park.

ALL WITHOUT CELL PHONES.

Certainly, times are different, and I am sensitive to the changes wrought by a more cynical society with greater access to news media. There are more challenges that involve technology and there are more gangs in high schools. I never worried about getting hurt at school. Ever. A gang fight would have been between the surfers and the Mexicans and they would punch each other until the principal showed up. I wonder sometimes if child abductions were just as common back in the day, but we just didn’t hear about them. Yes, it’s scary out there these days.

But – and it’s a big but – I want Melody to enjoy her childhood. I don’t want her to feel like she has to play soccer, baseball, basketball, or any sport if she doesn’t want to. If she does want to, I want her to enjoy it without the pressures of having to win. I want her to feel the freedom to make some decisions based on good judgement – like visiting a friend after school – and understanding the consequence of not getting her homework done.

There’s a great article about parenting on Time.com, and that’s what got me thinking about this. The new “backlash” against helicopter parenting is called “slow parenting” and in true American form, you can take a class on how to be a slow parent. Read the article and then consider the irony in that. Anyway, slow parenting advocates allowing your kids to make mistakes in order to learn from them, letting them get stuck so they independently figure out their resources to get out of the bind. That sort of thing. You know, kind of like how my parents raised me.

I think I am a slow parent. I think that’s okay.

What IS in a name?

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When we were deciding names for our daughter, we agonized over the decision. We wanted to be sure to select a name that would be distinctive and cute, traditional but a little bit different. Something that would coordinate with our last name nicely and not spell a bad word in its initials. Since we named her Melody, two more friends have named their daughters Melody. Choosing a child’s name is really a difficult decision for some parents. It can have repercussions through grade school if it’s weird or unusual – I can’t tell you how many times I’ve been called Aunt Martha by my peers! – and really, I don’t get the strange spellings we are seeing these days. I joked with Tara that we could spell my daughter’s name Melo’Dee. It was a joke though, don’t worry!

The middle name for some people is just as important. We settled on Rae, simply because we wanted to honor her grandfather Ray who will never have the joy of knowing her. Other old family names have been used in my family. John’s family seems to go with names new to the family. My friend really wanted to name her son Joaquin but her husband objected so that fell to the middle name.

Coordinating the first and middle names is difficult enough, but you have to look at how it all goes with the last name. You don’t want to wind up with a funny word spelled out in initials! One of the names we considered was Emilie (an old family name) and the middle name Grace, but John pointed out her initials would be EGG. Off went those names to the recycle bin. Rosemary Angela Gibbons? Nope! Henrietta Alice Gibbons? Uh, no. Francis Andrea Gibbons? Never! You get the picture.

Today I read an article expressing outrage – outrage I say! – that women change their last name upon marriage. Wait, back up a second…what? The author was seriously irritated that women give up their identity when they change their names after marriage. I really need to think about this, because personally I never thought of my last name as my identity, or even that changing it would change me. I always figured that when I got married, the act of combining my life with another person would be the big change. My name change is my badge of pride in being the wife of who I am married to! Our daughter shares our name too, and we are a family identified on paper by that name.

But again, that doesn’t make us who we are, does it? It’s not like we are the bin Laden family – that poor family is forever linked to Enemy #1, just like the Hitlers were. As a mere peon, doesn’t what I do in my life shape who I am rather than a name?

The article mentioned things like “would you want to listen to songs by Barbara Brolin? (Barbara Streisand)” Well, personally no, because I don’t care for her, but aside from that, I think this is a poor example. A person with an established media name becomes that commodity. If Barbara Streisand had really become famous as Barbara Apple Pie, we’d find that the norm and Barbara Streisand the tongue twister. It’s rare for a celebrity to change their name after marriage because it’s their trademark – and many times it isn’t their “real” name anyway, lending creedence to the trademark concept in the first place. Who wants to buy records by John Deutchendorf? Well, no one, but they sure lined up to buy them from John Denver, and I’m pretty sure the masses were not really interested in going to see Stanley Eisen front a band, but the minute he walks out on stage with a big black star painted over one eye, everyone knows Paul Stanley of KISS.

So, who we are…is it defined by our names? Or by how we live our lives? Or by the lessons we learn and teach?

If you ask me, I don’t think changing my name caused me to give up my identity. My name doesn’t make me, the same as my career or my choice of home town do not make me.

I make me who I am.